Blank Pages
by SHINeeGirl05
Summary: Diary Scene from Kal Ho Na Ho.


**First one-shot since a couple years of writing, decided to go for Bollywood this time, enjoy and review :D**

Aman watched silently as Naina screamed at Rohit. Her whole frame was shaking in anger, and delicate tears hid in her eyes, threatening to fall.

'_Its all over..' _Aman thought quietly to himself. He couldnt stop himself from falling in love with her no matter how hard he tried. He tried to keep himself from loving every little thing about her. But it was too late. He couldnt stop himself from loving the sweet dimple that caressed her face when she smiled. He couldnt stop himself from loving the sound of her laugh, like a thousand delicate bells. He couldnt stop herself from loving her hair pulled away from her face, and oh god from loving those _glasses.._ He couldnt stop himself from loving the fact that she thought her glasses would hide her tears. But most of all he couldnt stop himself from loving her. From loving Naina.

He had to protect her. Someone had to. Aman wasnt going to be around much longer. In his absence, someone would have to take care of her. So who cares how he really feels? It won't matter when he's gone. Gone forever.

These thoughts swam in his head until he noticed Naina angrily turning around and walking away. He had to confess his love to her. Had to let her know that she was the light in his life, the one thing that kept his happiness, the very existence of him, Aman. He had to tell her all this. Before it was too late.

Without even thinking about what he was doing, his hand dove into Rohit's pocket and whipped out his diary. Before he even understood what he was doing, he ignored Rohit's attempts to get it back, and said in a loud clear voice.

"Naina, i wish i could tell you how much i love you...I..I love you.. i love you very very much, Naina."

Naina turned around and Aman's chest tightened at the look on her face. It was filled with surprise, longing, and most of all, hope. Aman looked away from her eyes in order to control himself. He held the diary closer.

"And its written.. I love you and..." his voice trailed off. His fingers traced the blank pages.

"And.. when i close my eyes, i see you." he thought back to every time he sat with a smile playing on his face as he imagined Naina's face scrunched up in annoyance. Every time she hid her sweet smile. He couldnt bear to sleep anymore in fear of falling in love with her even more through his dreams.

"A-and.. when i open my eyes i long to see you." he remembered sitting all by himself, wishing she was with him. Wishing her gentle voice would whisper him to sleep, away from reality.

"When you are not with me, i see you in everything around me. Every second, every minute, every day." he almost smiled, thinking of all the times he took various girls to be Naina. He saw her everywhere he went. He recalled tapping his feet impatiently and watching every subtle movement of the clock's handles, just so he could so much as get a glimpse of her. He felt like he was going insane. But if being insane meant seeing her face then so be it.

"My eyes... look for my Naina." he almost smiled.

"Call it love, madness, or.. the beats of my heart.. Its all the same to me" he recalled crying so hard, every part of him just ached, longing for her touch to console him.

He realized he was crying and tried to get a hold of himself. But it was so hard. Looking into her brown eyes. Her lonely eyes. Her longing eyes. He realized he was saying every word he ever wanted to say to her. Every feeling that ever touched his heart.

"A lot of people have been in love..." he felt himself crying harder. Why did this have to be so hard?

"But my love is apart from theirs because..." He found himself so relieved at finally telling her all this, he barely whispered, "because they dont have you.." tears were streaming down her face.

"I can never forget you. I don't want to forget you." he stared into her tear-filled eyes.

The words he spoke next were what he was longing to say his whole life.

_"You are mine... and i will love you forever."_

The blank pages of the diary hung limply at his side. She gently closed her eyes, hiding her tears, her sadness, and herself.

"I will love you all my life, i will love you till i die, and..." his tears slid down his cheeks. "and..even after that.."

Tears ran down his cheeks quietly while she sobbed. He wiped away his tears and hid them from the faces of others. Aman let out a slight laugh, and muttered quietly about what stupid handwriting Rohit had. He hurried away before he could say anymore. He walked away quickly, his chest heaving, trying to find his breath, trying to put himself back together.

_Coward..._

He thought quietly. He hated himself for being such a coward. For not being able to truly tell her. He wanted to get as far away from her as possible so he wouldnt feel weakened by her delicate tears. But at the same time he wanted to run back and hold her in his arms. To wrap her up and hug her while whispering to her that it was all going to be okay.

But how would it be okay? How would it be okay when he loved her this much. How could anyone love anyone this much? It wasn't fair.. Why did he have to hurt her and hide how he truly felt.

Why was he such a coward? Why did he have to care so much for her? Why couldn't he just tell her the truth?

The answer was simple.

Because he loved her.

**Please review and give honest feedback and thank you so much for taking the time to read this :)**


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